House Games

Once again my status as the “sixth former with time on his hands” has found me roped into setting up the house Christmas dinner tonight. On the plus side it means I get to organise the seating plan which will ensure that I am not sitting amongst the arrogant bastards of the boarding house. I have decided to place myself between Adam Fuller because he is quite amusing, especially when inebriated, and Jonny Adkins because he is popular and will make me look cool. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. Obviously I’m pretty bloody awesome in my own right but there’s no harm in accentuating the positive..

Hargreaves wants me to come up with a game that everyone can play afterwards. That’s a tough call, considering there’s fifty of us that live here and eight members of staff who will be attending too. I’m tempted to suggest that he leads us in a game of hide and seek and then we all get smashed while he’s waiting for us in some cupboard. Oh, he also wants me to make sure that one of the third years takes a plate of food to Dominic Lafferty’s study so he at least gets something to eat. Big mistake. There’s every chance that that plate of food will end up smeared over the walls of the entrance hall if Lafferty’s behaviour of late is anything to go by. He’s really quite deranged. The sooner he gets out of the public school system the better. I think he’d agree with that too, given his utter loathing of anything vaguely privileged or middle class. Apparently he’s the heir to a multi million pound fortune as well. What a massive waste. He’ll only piss it up the wall on charitable donations and other pointless tat. Makes you sick…